So, if you read my other blog regularly and happened to stumble across this one, lucky you :P But this blog talks about my 1 year journey in Stockholm, and tonight I was just thinking back about how blessed I've been. There have been crappy times, but for every crappy period I've been through, I've had double the blessings to make up for it!
So let me count my blessings. I won't name you. If you ever read this, you know who you are ;)
Remember...
... when we talked for hours over the phone, even before we really met face to face? It was the middle of exams, but i enjoyed every single one of those chats. It felt like we connected, in some inexplicable way, and it made me look forward to this journey before it even began.
... when we roamed the streets of London and Edinburgh together? It was a precious 10 days spent with you, laughing over the stupidest things, like falling over while trying to ice skate, or trying to find our way back to our nice comfy beds. I remember standing, freezing, in the snow, waiting for you to get the key to your apartment. It was bone chillingly cold, but all i remember thinking of was whether you were safe.
... when i arrived in Stockholm? I was like a lost puppy not knowing where to go, but you came, showed me the way to the place i now call home, and even carried my bags for me! Remember how we stood waiting for the bus to come, with snow falling lightly all around us? It was beautiful.
... the three of us stumbling back from Gula Villan? Our arms were linked, we were high, it was freezing, but my heart was filled with warmth. I tripped and fell flat on my face in the snow, and even though my cheek was sore, we still laughed happily home.
... talking well past midnight in your cozy room? The carpets, the furniture, the lighting - all these things made your room feel snug, but it was you who generated the warmth in that room. Your heart, full of passion and emotion. You'll be a wonderful designer someday. I know you will.
... meeting for the first time? You just came from the gym, and as we walked to your place, i felt small beside you. i never thought we'd become friends - it was pure luck that we ever met, or perhaps i was just blessed. Our first ride out to your childhood home was exhilarating. You couldn't see my face then, but i was grinning away like a fool, loving every moment as the beautiful countryside whizzed by.
... the two weeks you spent here in Stockholm? I'm sure you were bored to death. I regret not having been able to spend more time out with you. But i loved spending time with you, chatting late into the night, walking all around Stockholm, simply having you around. I still remember the shock and surprise when you asked me to 'go downstairs' in the middle of work - and you brought lunch! Scrambled eggs with mushrooms an sausages. My fav :) I'm so glad you came.
... when you came over to Stockholm in May/June? It was only for a few short days, and i was so tired that i fell asleep during every movie we watched, but you never complained. We went bbq-ing, walking for an hour before we got to the bbq spot because i took the wrong route, but we laughed all the way. We forgot the drinks, forgot the napkins, forget the cutlery. But we improvised (lemon on hotdogs to 'reduce' the salt! :P) and had the best time of our lives anyway. You kept surprising me with stuff, and i kept grinning until it felt like my face was going to split. Those days spent with you, i will treasure.
... riding in the rain, and playing soccer with your friends? It didn't matter that i couldn't kick the ball to save my life - i had fun all the same. i couldn't understand why you were being so nice, even though we barely knew each other then. But it made my weekends, and i kept looking forward to the next time we'd go out.
... when the three of you trouped over to Stockholm for 2 weeks? We took a cruise, had road trips, went to the Ice Hotel. You ordered alcoholic drinks for me - i was surprised. And touched. You tolerated my sneaky smoking, didn't mind when i had to work and couldn't spend time with all of you, understood when i made mistakes, doted on me when i did nothing to deserve it. Strawberry plucking made me remember my childhood days. i noticed the white hairs that have grown - i'm sorry. I must have contributed to most of those. Thank you for always being there. I only wish siao kia had come along too.
... when we talked through the night in your room? We chatted for hours, talking about everything, enjoying the company that we had with each other. I was supposed to get my laundry, but it was so warm in your room and so cold outside, i decided to curl up with you to sleep instead. It felt like I'd been transported back in time - to the overnight camps that I had with my childhood friends.
... when we went for dinner at your mum's? Your family and friends were there, and your friends were trying to fix my bike. It was the second time i met your mum, but it felt like family. Comfortable, down to earth, honest and warm. Thank you. You made me feel like i was home.
... when we spent a weekend at rich man's island? It was then that i discovered your uncanny sense of direction. And learned the difference between sjö and sju. And found Karl the blue beetle. We walked, sat by the beach, went to the sauna, enjoyed life and had good food like the brats that were there. I learnt more about you and got a peek into your past. Thank you for trusting me. Watched tv in the room at night, just enjoying the luxury of it all. It was peaceful. It was goooood. :P
... when we started on SMUS? The team came together in less than a week - a team more than I could ever hope for or dream of. Not knowing whether it would be possible, we all decided to give it a shot in the dark. Within weeks, we started to firm up our plans. I feel so privileged to be able to 'lead' this team, despite my inexperience and incapability. More than just working for this event, you guys have supported me. Not only the SMUS team, but all the people that have heard about this event and have helped to spread it so far. Lennart, Gunilla, Therése, Andreas, Stefan, Brian, Gustav, Olle, Oscar, Jessica... So many people who have heard about it and are trying to support it in whatever way they can! It has made me want to work harder, to pour more energy into this project, to try. I still don't know whether we'll make it, or whether the camp participants will love it, or if anyone will even sign up for it. But what i know for sure - this journey that we've undertaken is already worth it, even before we've run half the race. Because you guys made it worthwhile.
... chatting with each other on the phone for long stretches at a time? Updating each other on what was happening, getting to know each other more in the process. It's amazing how we can be so different yet so similar at the same time. Thank you for listening, for overlooking my faults, for covering my weaknesses. Thank you for treating me as a friend, a colleague, almost an equal, even though I don't deserve such respect. Thank you for being such a vital part of my last 9 months here.
... the night when i sent you home after pizza dinner at my place? It was raining, it was cold, i didn't know the way. So you used hand signals. Hahaha. I was giggling all the way through the ride, having fun all the way. Remember the other time i sent you back after your party? It's these times that i wish i knew how to drive and had a car. Every time you sit behind me, i feel like i'm carrying a precious parcel. I don't want to hurt you. Not even a scratch. But when you sit behind me, you give me the confidence to ride safely. Your strength, your presence - it lifts me. My friend, you're strong. Thank you for teaching me that "you don't need a reason to be happy!"
There's so much more I could write - I've been writing for almost 2 hours already, while fondly recounting my blessings over the year. Thank you, my friends, for being here. Because you, you and you. You're the ones i can truly call 'my friend'.
